I am beginning to believe that I black out on a regular basis. I lose consciousness and another person takes over my body much like those ever popular soap opera cases of multiple personality disorder.
Why do I think this? Because there is obviously someone other than me parenting my children. Someone who loves it when they bicker and fight. Someone who immediately caves in at the first sign of tears. Someone who gives in to whining on a regular basis.
If this weren't the case, my darling children, who have lived with me the entirety of their little lives, would have certainly figured out that whining is a sure fire way to make this mother dig her heels in. Asking me the same question 14 times is not going to get you a different answer. And changing to a cry or whine while asking time number 15 is definitely not going to work in your favor.
Because they continue to do these things, I am certain that my mind is regularly overruled by this other, hidden personality who consistently caves in to such obvious, and pathetic attempts at manipulation. Otherwise the FarmHands would have given it up years ago.
Showing posts with label FarmHand Fun Facts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label FarmHand Fun Facts. Show all posts
July 12, 2013
September 11, 2012
Tiny Tragedies
The bus drops the FarmHands off at 4 o'clock each afternoon. By 4:02 my once quiet house is a swirling mass of chaos and confusion and conflict. Every day. It doesn't matter how well they're getting along- once they hit the door they all fall apart.
I've given myself over to the rush of crazy that cannot be avoided from 4:02 to 4:30 every day. There will be crying. There will be arguments. There will be weakness from near starvation. There will be injuries or stomach aches or headaches or other ailments. There will be sadness and heartache.
But just occasionally, there will be a hug for mom.
Today Bitsy fell and skinned her elbow the moment they hit the driveway. She screamed bloody murder all the way up to the house while BabyGirl coddled her and B.B. screamed, "Bitsy's hurt! Bitsy's hurt!" I could see from the front windows that she was not "run down the driveway and carry her to the house" hurt, so I didn't. Once inside, she cried for 30 minutes about a scrape she would normally slap a wet paper towel on and run off to play. She cried for a cup of milk. She screamed for a banana. And finally, she passed out on the couch sucking her fingers half wrapped in a blanket.
B.B. entered the house ready to fall to pieces because we're not doing Boy Scouts. This has been an on going argument since #1 Son started 1st grade. Every year they have an assembly for the boys from 1st to 5th grade where the praises of Boy Scouts are sung. Every year they bring home their sign up sheet and every year I say no.
I have nothing against the Boy Scouts- on the contrary- I think they're a wonderful organization and if I only had the boys, I'd sign them up in a heart beat. But I have girls. Yes, I know, they have girl scouts, but I don't have time to shuttle 4 kids to 4 different places 15 times a week (all exaggerations, I know). We have our hands full with school, work, 4-H, and cheerleading. I am not adding scouting to the mix. They boys know this but inevitably we have the same issue every school year.
B.B. is convinced that every boy in the entire school, save him and his brother, are partying their lives away at scout meetings complete with free toys and all you can eat s'mores. Nothing I say can dissuade him, do I've given up trying. I just ride out the very brief wave of grief. It rarely lasts more than a day or two and
never has lasting effects........although I'm mildly convinced Boy Scouts will be B.B.'s Easy Bake Oven. You see, Inkling had an Easy Bake Oven and I always wanted one but my parents would never buy it.
I'm off to pout now. And dream of the fabulous brownies I never got to bake with a hundred watt bulb.
I've given myself over to the rush of crazy that cannot be avoided from 4:02 to 4:30 every day. There will be crying. There will be arguments. There will be weakness from near starvation. There will be injuries or stomach aches or headaches or other ailments. There will be sadness and heartache.
But just occasionally, there will be a hug for mom.
Today Bitsy fell and skinned her elbow the moment they hit the driveway. She screamed bloody murder all the way up to the house while BabyGirl coddled her and B.B. screamed, "Bitsy's hurt! Bitsy's hurt!" I could see from the front windows that she was not "run down the driveway and carry her to the house" hurt, so I didn't. Once inside, she cried for 30 minutes about a scrape she would normally slap a wet paper towel on and run off to play. She cried for a cup of milk. She screamed for a banana. And finally, she passed out on the couch sucking her fingers half wrapped in a blanket.
B.B. entered the house ready to fall to pieces because we're not doing Boy Scouts. This has been an on going argument since #1 Son started 1st grade. Every year they have an assembly for the boys from 1st to 5th grade where the praises of Boy Scouts are sung. Every year they bring home their sign up sheet and every year I say no.
I have nothing against the Boy Scouts- on the contrary- I think they're a wonderful organization and if I only had the boys, I'd sign them up in a heart beat. But I have girls. Yes, I know, they have girl scouts, but I don't have time to shuttle 4 kids to 4 different places 15 times a week (all exaggerations, I know). We have our hands full with school, work, 4-H, and cheerleading. I am not adding scouting to the mix. They boys know this but inevitably we have the same issue every school year.
B.B. is convinced that every boy in the entire school, save him and his brother, are partying their lives away at scout meetings complete with free toys and all you can eat s'mores. Nothing I say can dissuade him, do I've given up trying. I just ride out the very brief wave of grief. It rarely lasts more than a day or two and
never has lasting effects........although I'm mildly convinced Boy Scouts will be B.B.'s Easy Bake Oven. You see, Inkling had an Easy Bake Oven and I always wanted one but my parents would never buy it.
I'm off to pout now. And dream of the fabulous brownies I never got to bake with a hundred watt bulb.
August 8, 2012
This Summer needs a name.
A name that denotes all manner of evil. A name that tags it every more as a summer not worth repeating. A name that leaves no doubt as to the horribleness of it. I'll open up the comments to suggestions.
We started off good. I had a new job to look forward to. We had our first 4-H fairs to attend. We had a swimming pool, heat, and sunshine. And then things started going south...and not in the I-get-to-go-south-to-visit-friends-and-family kind of way.
First Grandma M&M discovered the colon cancer she battled 36 years ago was back. Waiting and waiting and waiting finally gave way to a date for her to have surgery. May 29th she went in. Things went well. Recovery was going to take a long time, but she was going to be fine.
The next morning found me in the doctor's office in pain. That afternoon I was on the operating table. It wasn't the appendicitis nor the appendectomy that was the hard part. It was the 6 weeks of recovery after abdominal surgery that knocked me down.
In the meantime, Grandma didn't recover as quickly nor as well as we thought she would. She went to a nursing home to recover. Mama shuttled back & forth between the two of us and in the process hurt her foot.
Then I ended up in the hospital for a longer stay and still don't quite know the cause. Colitis is not something I'd wish on my worst enemy and something I hope and pray is not recurring in my case.
Just over a week ago #1 Son began complaining about his under arms itching. When I looked at them I discovered he had brown, scaly patches under his arms. He's very prone to skin issues so I told him to use the cream our doctor has prescribed many times in the past. After a few days they turned red & raw. I told him to leave the cream alone and we'd show the dermatologist when he goes on the 17th.
Monday showed we couldn't wait for the 17th. He was in so much pain he couldn't lower his arms. Thank the Lord the dermatologist had a cancellation that afternoon.
I willingly admit I didn't want to go. I hate the drive. I hate dragging all 4 kids that far to spend 3 minutes in an office with a nurse practitioner (nothing against the NP- she's really good). But I was beyond unprepared when she suggested his skin issues might be caused by diabetes.
Yesterday we went to the hospital for a fasting blood draw. The tech took an extra vial of blood in case the doctor decided to have an A1C done later. I'm glad she did. His blood sugar was 105- only slightly elevated. The doctor's office wanted to wait 3-4 weeks and do another draw. I told them to order the A1C. They did.
Today we got the call that his A1C was 5.7. Normal is below 6. Now doc wants a finger stick every morning for 30 days to see what we're looking at.
To be entirely honest, I am not handling this well. I can be sick. I can have surgery. I can spend my summer recovering from what ever. But not my son. He cannot go through this. He cannot spend time worrying and fretting. He cannot be scared and uncertain. These things are not OK with me.
I know he will be fine no matter how the test come out. I know that the changes that may be necessary will not be the end of us. I know that we can deal with this. But right now I'm done. I'm over it all. I'm sick to death of worry and fright and sickness.
I am ready for this summer to end.
We started off good. I had a new job to look forward to. We had our first 4-H fairs to attend. We had a swimming pool, heat, and sunshine. And then things started going south...and not in the I-get-to-go-south-to-visit-friends-and-family kind of way.
First Grandma M&M discovered the colon cancer she battled 36 years ago was back. Waiting and waiting and waiting finally gave way to a date for her to have surgery. May 29th she went in. Things went well. Recovery was going to take a long time, but she was going to be fine.
The next morning found me in the doctor's office in pain. That afternoon I was on the operating table. It wasn't the appendicitis nor the appendectomy that was the hard part. It was the 6 weeks of recovery after abdominal surgery that knocked me down.
In the meantime, Grandma didn't recover as quickly nor as well as we thought she would. She went to a nursing home to recover. Mama shuttled back & forth between the two of us and in the process hurt her foot.
Then I ended up in the hospital for a longer stay and still don't quite know the cause. Colitis is not something I'd wish on my worst enemy and something I hope and pray is not recurring in my case.
Just over a week ago #1 Son began complaining about his under arms itching. When I looked at them I discovered he had brown, scaly patches under his arms. He's very prone to skin issues so I told him to use the cream our doctor has prescribed many times in the past. After a few days they turned red & raw. I told him to leave the cream alone and we'd show the dermatologist when he goes on the 17th.
Monday showed we couldn't wait for the 17th. He was in so much pain he couldn't lower his arms. Thank the Lord the dermatologist had a cancellation that afternoon.
I willingly admit I didn't want to go. I hate the drive. I hate dragging all 4 kids that far to spend 3 minutes in an office with a nurse practitioner (nothing against the NP- she's really good). But I was beyond unprepared when she suggested his skin issues might be caused by diabetes.
Yesterday we went to the hospital for a fasting blood draw. The tech took an extra vial of blood in case the doctor decided to have an A1C done later. I'm glad she did. His blood sugar was 105- only slightly elevated. The doctor's office wanted to wait 3-4 weeks and do another draw. I told them to order the A1C. They did.
Today we got the call that his A1C was 5.7. Normal is below 6. Now doc wants a finger stick every morning for 30 days to see what we're looking at.
To be entirely honest, I am not handling this well. I can be sick. I can have surgery. I can spend my summer recovering from what ever. But not my son. He cannot go through this. He cannot spend time worrying and fretting. He cannot be scared and uncertain. These things are not OK with me.
I know he will be fine no matter how the test come out. I know that the changes that may be necessary will not be the end of us. I know that we can deal with this. But right now I'm done. I'm over it all. I'm sick to death of worry and fright and sickness.
I am ready for this summer to end.
February 3, 2012
What have you done for them lately?
As a parent I find myself doing odd things to help out my kids or just to make them happy. Today I laid on the couch with half my head hanging off so Bitsy could comb my hair for 20 minutes solid. Yesterday I spent nearly and hour jogging from BabyGirl's room where she was doing her homework, to the kitchen table where #1 Son was doing his, to the dining room table where B.B. was signing Valentines just to keep everyone happy. I've played Legos, I've turned furniture upside down in search of lost action figures, I've brewed Bavarian Blackberry tea for a tea party, I've scraped bark off walking sticks,I've dressed countless Barbies and baby dolls, I've searched through gravel piles for hours on end to find "Indian Beads." Parenting takes many skills-skills I never knew I had.
Today I spent the afternoon separating the pages of a new Bible Husband bought for BabyGirl. The outer edges of the pages are printed with a really cute pink and green design but the printing made all the pages stick together. Husband was worried that she'd rip the onion skin pages trying to get them apart so he sat down with it in the minutes before he had to leave for work and pulled apart the entire Old Testament. I really didn't know what he was doing at the time & when I asked he explained it to me adding, "This is what a good parent does." That left the New Testament to me. It really didn't take long, but it did make me think of all the strange things we do for our kids.
It begs the question: What kind of odd things have you done for your kids recently?
Today I spent the afternoon separating the pages of a new Bible Husband bought for BabyGirl. The outer edges of the pages are printed with a really cute pink and green design but the printing made all the pages stick together. Husband was worried that she'd rip the onion skin pages trying to get them apart so he sat down with it in the minutes before he had to leave for work and pulled apart the entire Old Testament. I really didn't know what he was doing at the time & when I asked he explained it to me adding, "This is what a good parent does." That left the New Testament to me. It really didn't take long, but it did make me think of all the strange things we do for our kids.
It begs the question: What kind of odd things have you done for your kids recently?
January 19, 2012
Irrefutable Proof That Evolution is an Impossibility
My children are still alive.
According to the theory of evolution, creatures will adapt to their surroundings & circumstances over generations. Unfortunately, no one has told the FarmHands this.
The way I see it, self preservation should be the strongest of all evolutionary instincts. My children are completely devoid of it. Not only do they like to do dangerous & irresponsible things day in & day out, but they have also failed to learn to avoid the most dangerous of all nature's living creatures: PMS Mom.
Women have been suffering from PMS since shortly after the Fall of Man (or would have been if Eve had ever had time to menstruate instead of giving birth to the entire population of mankind). All children should have developed an inner alarm that goes off as soon as Mom's hormones begin to fluctuate. My kids have developed one, but it appears to work in reverse.
You see, as soon as PMS rears it's ugly, malformed, malevolent head, my children all lose their ever loving minds. Instead of becoming complacent, calm, and obedient (as any self preservation instinct in good working order would) they go completely bananas. The more overwrought I get, the worse their behavior becomes. The bickering turns to full on fist fights. The volume kicks up to decibels just under those produced at major international air ports. The fun & giggles turns into complete mob mentality hysteria. In short, they all go insane.
And me? I'm left a twitching, blubbering mess on the floor of the shower (think every drug withdraw scene in every movie you've ever seen).
Should my children ever go Stepford on me just as I being the downward spiral into mood swings, night sweats, headaches, fatigue, and cramps, I might rethink my stance on evolution...but for now, I'm still not buying it.
According to the theory of evolution, creatures will adapt to their surroundings & circumstances over generations. Unfortunately, no one has told the FarmHands this.
The way I see it, self preservation should be the strongest of all evolutionary instincts. My children are completely devoid of it. Not only do they like to do dangerous & irresponsible things day in & day out, but they have also failed to learn to avoid the most dangerous of all nature's living creatures: PMS Mom.
Women have been suffering from PMS since shortly after the Fall of Man (or would have been if Eve had ever had time to menstruate instead of giving birth to the entire population of mankind). All children should have developed an inner alarm that goes off as soon as Mom's hormones begin to fluctuate. My kids have developed one, but it appears to work in reverse.
You see, as soon as PMS rears it's ugly, malformed, malevolent head, my children all lose their ever loving minds. Instead of becoming complacent, calm, and obedient (as any self preservation instinct in good working order would) they go completely bananas. The more overwrought I get, the worse their behavior becomes. The bickering turns to full on fist fights. The volume kicks up to decibels just under those produced at major international air ports. The fun & giggles turns into complete mob mentality hysteria. In short, they all go insane.
And me? I'm left a twitching, blubbering mess on the floor of the shower (think every drug withdraw scene in every movie you've ever seen).
Should my children ever go Stepford on me just as I being the downward spiral into mood swings, night sweats, headaches, fatigue, and cramps, I might rethink my stance on evolution...but for now, I'm still not buying it.
January 14, 2012
Send help, they're all starving.
I did not go to the grocery yesterday. In fact, Husband is going to bring home a gallon of milk after work tonight so we don't have to grocery shop until Sunday afternoon. Do you have any idea what this means? It means my children might actually starve to death in the interim.
Yes, we're down to a single frozen pizza (as opposed to the two or three that are normally there). We're completely out of apples. We only have 2/3s of a box of Gogurt left in the freezer. There's less than a cup of pancake syrup in the bottle. We may even run out of Pop Tarts before the day is over. As you can tell, the situation is rather dire. As you can also tell, we're totally health nuts when it comes to what we eat (yes, I am a giant liar).
Forget the pounds & pounds & pounds of freshly butchered pork in the freezers. Forget the cans & cans of veggies in the pantry. Forget the 2 loaves of whole wheat bread in the bread box. We're running low on chocolate chip granola bars!
My poor children. I hope they make it through the night. At least there's still microwave pop corn....like 25 bags of the stuff. Remind me not to put it on my shopping list.
Forget the pounds & pounds & pounds of freshly butchered pork in the freezers. Forget the cans & cans of veggies in the pantry. Forget the 2 loaves of whole wheat bread in the bread box. We're running low on chocolate chip granola bars!
My poor children. I hope they make it through the night. At least there's still microwave pop corn....like 25 bags of the stuff. Remind me not to put it on my shopping list.
December 12, 2011
Wanted: LOTR Expert
Wanted to hire for a week or two: Someone with intimate knowledge of the entire Lord of the Rings world both literary & film versions. Must have in depth knowledge of the inner workings of the minds of both J.R.R. Tolkien & Peter Jackson.
Job Description: To sit with my children & watch the movies over & over again while answering their every question no matter how obvious or obscure no matter how many times they may ask the same question.
I kid you not, BabyGirl alone must have asked no less than 200 questions tonight while watching Return of the King. That's not counting the 75 questions a piece shot out by her brothers before their bedtime came around.
"Why does Smeagol hate Sam?"
"Why doesn't Frodo believe Sam about Smeagol being bad?"
"I thought Smeagol told Gollum to go away & never come back. Why is he back?"
"Why is it so hard for Frodo to walk?"
"Why does Frodo have to go with the elves?"
"Why are the elves tall? I thought they were supposed to be short."
"Why are the Hobbits' pants so short?"
"Is the king of the ghost army the same dead guy who tried to pull Frodo down into the swamp?"
"Sam carried the ring for a while. Why isn't he going with the Elves?"
"Doesn't Frodo have a life with Sam in the Shire? Why does he have to go with the Elves?"
"Why are Gollums eyes so big?"
"Why is Gandalf white now? I thought the white wizard was bad."
"Why won't Gollum eat the bread?"
"Wouldn't they die if they got that close to the lava?"
"Is Frodo just dreaming or is Gladriel really there?"
"Why wasn't Aragon already king?"
"Why can't a man kill the Nazgul?"
"Why do they call Peregrin 'Pippin'?"
"Why is that guy trying to set his son on fire? Can't he tell he's still alive?"
"What is that giant red eye thing?"
"I thought Isildur killed Sauron. How can he be coming back?"
"How old is that guy playing Frodo?"
"Do you think he's really a pretty happy guy in real life or is he really sad like Frodo at the end?"
Understand my problem? And that's only a portion of what was asked tonight...and only while watching the last movie. I thought I had a decent working knowledge of the story having seen the movies a few times, the cartoons many times, and having read the books a time or two...but no. My kids need to know what size shoes Hobbits would wear if Hobbits ever took up shoe wearing. Next time we watch them I'm going to take a nerve pill first & just make crap up as I go along.
Job Description: To sit with my children & watch the movies over & over again while answering their every question no matter how obvious or obscure no matter how many times they may ask the same question.
I kid you not, BabyGirl alone must have asked no less than 200 questions tonight while watching Return of the King. That's not counting the 75 questions a piece shot out by her brothers before their bedtime came around.
"Why does Smeagol hate Sam?"
"Why doesn't Frodo believe Sam about Smeagol being bad?"
"I thought Smeagol told Gollum to go away & never come back. Why is he back?"
"Why is it so hard for Frodo to walk?"
"Why does Frodo have to go with the elves?"
"Why are the elves tall? I thought they were supposed to be short."
"Why are the Hobbits' pants so short?"
"Is the king of the ghost army the same dead guy who tried to pull Frodo down into the swamp?"
"Sam carried the ring for a while. Why isn't he going with the Elves?"
"Doesn't Frodo have a life with Sam in the Shire? Why does he have to go with the Elves?"
"Why are Gollums eyes so big?"
"Why is Gandalf white now? I thought the white wizard was bad."
"Why won't Gollum eat the bread?"
"Wouldn't they die if they got that close to the lava?"
"Is Frodo just dreaming or is Gladriel really there?"
"Why wasn't Aragon already king?"
"Why can't a man kill the Nazgul?"
"Why do they call Peregrin 'Pippin'?"
"Why is that guy trying to set his son on fire? Can't he tell he's still alive?"
"What is that giant red eye thing?"
"I thought Isildur killed Sauron. How can he be coming back?"
"How old is that guy playing Frodo?"
"Do you think he's really a pretty happy guy in real life or is he really sad like Frodo at the end?"
Understand my problem? And that's only a portion of what was asked tonight...and only while watching the last movie. I thought I had a decent working knowledge of the story having seen the movies a few times, the cartoons many times, and having read the books a time or two...but no. My kids need to know what size shoes Hobbits would wear if Hobbits ever took up shoe wearing. Next time we watch them I'm going to take a nerve pill first & just make crap up as I go along.
November 26, 2011
Black Friday should be canceled.
Thus says BabyGirl. Especially after hearing about a college kid wanting to get into a wrestling match with her uncle over some video games the uncle already had in his possession....and the 6 hour wait in line another uncle had to get a laptop....and stories of people waiting in the parking lot for their "competitors" after the sale was over....and an acquaintance having a gun pulled on him last year over a toy.
Get a grip folks. Yeah, cheap electronics are nice, but is it worth trampling each other to get a Kindle? If my ten year old sees the flaw in this thinking, why can't the rest of the country get on board?
That being said, we did brave the crowds yesterday afternoon. Not door busters. Not really on the hunt for anything in particular, but we had to be in town so figured why waste the trip? We had to have the oil changed & the earliest appointment was on Black Friday. After the oil change, we decided it wasn't worth an extra trip to town to get groceries so we made a day of it. In all honesty, Black Friday isn't a bad day for grocery shopping at Wal-Mart. No one's on that side of the store.
I did get the Lord of the Rings movies for $1.95 each making the geek in my very happy!
Thanksgiving was spent with Husband's folks, sister, and youngest brother. We had a nice visit & a good meal followed by total melt down when #1 Son lost every game of Uno played with his aunt, siblings, and grandmother.
That evening the FarmHands & I went to Uncle Gick & Unkie Di's to hang out with the crowd that gathers there every year. All of Unkie Di's family comes down from the Chicago area to spend the holiday along with a cousin of mine & his wife we rarely get to see. It's crowded & loud & more than a bit chaotic, but I love it. We talk & laugh & eat & have a great time.
Today Husband & the boys are doing manly things outside while I wash dishes & tackle Mount Saint Laundry & hope Husband & I can go out tonight. Monday will be our 14th wedding anniversary. In all we're having a quiet (for us) weekend.
Before I forget, please, please, please keep Uncle Gick in your prayers. He's having his pacemaker replaced on Thursday. He's going from a pacemaker to a defibrillator & that requires different leads. That's why this could be a much more involved process than a normal pacemaker change. Uncle Gick has Cardiomyopathy and has had it for about 20 years. If the old leads to do not come out easily, there could be real complications. Please pray for him & for the rest of us while we wait for the end results.
Get a grip folks. Yeah, cheap electronics are nice, but is it worth trampling each other to get a Kindle? If my ten year old sees the flaw in this thinking, why can't the rest of the country get on board?
That being said, we did brave the crowds yesterday afternoon. Not door busters. Not really on the hunt for anything in particular, but we had to be in town so figured why waste the trip? We had to have the oil changed & the earliest appointment was on Black Friday. After the oil change, we decided it wasn't worth an extra trip to town to get groceries so we made a day of it. In all honesty, Black Friday isn't a bad day for grocery shopping at Wal-Mart. No one's on that side of the store.
I did get the Lord of the Rings movies for $1.95 each making the geek in my very happy!
Thanksgiving was spent with Husband's folks, sister, and youngest brother. We had a nice visit & a good meal followed by total melt down when #1 Son lost every game of Uno played with his aunt, siblings, and grandmother.
That evening the FarmHands & I went to Uncle Gick & Unkie Di's to hang out with the crowd that gathers there every year. All of Unkie Di's family comes down from the Chicago area to spend the holiday along with a cousin of mine & his wife we rarely get to see. It's crowded & loud & more than a bit chaotic, but I love it. We talk & laugh & eat & have a great time.
Today Husband & the boys are doing manly things outside while I wash dishes & tackle Mount Saint Laundry & hope Husband & I can go out tonight. Monday will be our 14th wedding anniversary. In all we're having a quiet (for us) weekend.
Before I forget, please, please, please keep Uncle Gick in your prayers. He's having his pacemaker replaced on Thursday. He's going from a pacemaker to a defibrillator & that requires different leads. That's why this could be a much more involved process than a normal pacemaker change. Uncle Gick has Cardiomyopathy and has had it for about 20 years. If the old leads to do not come out easily, there could be real complications. Please pray for him & for the rest of us while we wait for the end results.
October 10, 2011
Today
Be thankful you cannot smell my blog. Bunnies may be super cute, but they also stink really bad. I cannot imagine having one in the house unless it was absolutely litter box trained. We currently have 10 rabbits. The FarmHands are going to show some at the fair next year for their 4-H projects.
About a week ago, I started working on this:
It's my sassafras walking stick. Husband found it by the creek. It was dead & dry so he broke it down & brought it to me. I was working on a walking stick made from some kind of elm (?) at the time. The sassafras was really beautiful so the elm was set aside for a much later date. I stripped off the bark, smoothed off the knot holes, and sanded it all down just the way I wanted it. Saturday I coated it with polyurethane. I put on the last coat this morning & now I just have to wait for it to dry. I'm rather proud of it, if I do say so myself.
Sunlight reflecting off the pond at the end of the dock.
About a week ago, I started working on this:
It's my sassafras walking stick. Husband found it by the creek. It was dead & dry so he broke it down & brought it to me. I was working on a walking stick made from some kind of elm (?) at the time. The sassafras was really beautiful so the elm was set aside for a much later date. I stripped off the bark, smoothed off the knot holes, and sanded it all down just the way I wanted it. Saturday I coated it with polyurethane. I put on the last coat this morning & now I just have to wait for it to dry. I'm rather proud of it, if I do say so myself.Today has already been a day jam packed with adventure....and it's only 12:30. We got up early & headed out with Beffie to her boyfriend's house to get some feeder pigs. Loaded 2 rather large pigs into a not quite large enough dog kennel in the back of the old van (Mammy) and drove 30 miles home with the smell of hog poop wafting through the vehicle.
Big Red is the Duroc on the left and the black & white (looks like a hampshire but is really a cross of a few different breeds) has been named Thor. Initially we were discussing them being a 4-H project, but instead we're going to stick with bunnies until we get the hang of it. These boys will be for dinner in a few months.
Sunlight reflecting off the pond at the end of the dock.
Husband wrestled them into their pen & I dug out BabyGirl's camera. I know they're not the best pictures, but it's been so long since I've posted any, I really needed to share.
On Friday Husband had an order form for the USDA's fall tree sale in our area. They had 6 or 7 kinds of trees to choose from for $1-2 a piece. We ordered 25 pecan trees to put up on the hill east of our house & I'm getting 5 red buds for the front of the house since my dog woods have all died. And if anyone is looking for a tree with a great shape & beautiful fall colors for their yard, may I suggest the sassafras? We have quite a few by the creek & they're beautiful!
My boots & Husband's coveralls & flannel shirt waiting for a run through the Sanitize setting on my washing machine. Nothing like the smell of pig poop in the morning.
My White Board. It's stuck to my back door with super magnets. This are today's words of encouragement. Normally it's on the inside of the door, but that didn't work so well with BabyGirl's cheap-o camera.
September 18, 2011
I love the out doors....
So long as it stays out doors. When things that thrive in nature move into my home, I don't deal with it well.
Case & point: The tree frog that decided to vacation in my shower last week.
Husband was getting in the shower one morning after chores when he hollered, "Hey, FarmWife, come see what's in here!" Initially I was a bit hesitant because...well....because my husband can be a little...well...how to put this discreetly?......(Daddy you might want to skip this part-fair warning)....a bit strange when it comes to mating calls (I warned you, Daddy). But my second & nearly as immediate thought was, "Oh no. There's a snake in the bath tub. Please Lord, do not let there be a snake in my bath tub!"
The certainty of a snake in the house stemmed from our earlier adventures last weekend.
As many of you know, our house is surrounded by woods. Husband had to clear out a decent chunk of one of the woods when we put our house in. There were 2 tree stumps left on the west side of our driveway & Uncle E brought over a bunch of flowers & planted them between the stumps. A few years ago, one stump rotted out entirely. The second stump has been moving that way for quite a while now. Last spring, the FarmHands and I found a nest of hatched snake eggs in the base of the still standing stump. There were no snakes in sight & after investigating the empty shells for a few hours, they were promptly forgotten.
Last weekend, I walked past the stump and a flutter in the wind caught my eye. When I got closer I realized it was a snake skin stuck in the rotten wood. I called the FarmHands over to check it out & BabyGirl asked if she could take it to school for their science lab. I got a Ziploc bag & gently freed the skin from the stump. As I was pulling it out I discovered 3 or 4 more full shed skins. We gathered them up, found a few remaining egg shells, and packaged them all to send to school.
That's when I gotstupid brave. With a twig, I poked away some of the rotten wood to see how far gone the stump was. As a large chunk fell away, a small head shot out of the stump at me. I screamed & jumped & laughed all at once (you know the reaction, we've all seen it before). Husband came to the rescue with his shovel (he was on his way to dig out what he could of the stump), scooped the small tree snake up, and tossed it out in the woods. As he continued to demolish the stump, snakes continued to slither out of the bottom of the stump. In all, we "relocated" 4 small snakes and made an entire colony of ants homeless. My theory is that the snakes had been living in the stump off of ants sharing their space.
A few days later Uncle Gick came over & the FarmHands were telling him about the family of snakes when one more slithered out mid skin shed. It shot into a clump of day lilies and Bitsy decided to help it shed it's skin. As she grabbed the tail of the skin, the snake made a break out the front of the clump of greenery & what was left of it's shed.
So after our Week of the Five Snakes, when Husband called to me from the bathroom, I was sure what I was about to find.
I was wrong.
Under the soap holder in my shower, sat a walnut sized, rather terrified tree frog. How he got into the house, much less my shower, we may never know. But what I do know is when I tried to catch him with a paper towel, he jumped out from under the soap dish, landed briefly on my arm (causing another scream, jump, laugh), on to the floor & under the edge of our vanity where Husband cornered & caught him. I tossed him out the side door with a stern warning not to come back in my house no matter how posh he finds my bathroom.
Yes, I love the out of doors. I just don't want to share my living space with it.
Case & point: The tree frog that decided to vacation in my shower last week.
Husband was getting in the shower one morning after chores when he hollered, "Hey, FarmWife, come see what's in here!" Initially I was a bit hesitant because...well....because my husband can be a little...well...how to put this discreetly?......(Daddy you might want to skip this part-fair warning)....a bit strange when it comes to mating calls (I warned you, Daddy). But my second & nearly as immediate thought was, "Oh no. There's a snake in the bath tub. Please Lord, do not let there be a snake in my bath tub!"
The certainty of a snake in the house stemmed from our earlier adventures last weekend.
As many of you know, our house is surrounded by woods. Husband had to clear out a decent chunk of one of the woods when we put our house in. There were 2 tree stumps left on the west side of our driveway & Uncle E brought over a bunch of flowers & planted them between the stumps. A few years ago, one stump rotted out entirely. The second stump has been moving that way for quite a while now. Last spring, the FarmHands and I found a nest of hatched snake eggs in the base of the still standing stump. There were no snakes in sight & after investigating the empty shells for a few hours, they were promptly forgotten.
Last weekend, I walked past the stump and a flutter in the wind caught my eye. When I got closer I realized it was a snake skin stuck in the rotten wood. I called the FarmHands over to check it out & BabyGirl asked if she could take it to school for their science lab. I got a Ziploc bag & gently freed the skin from the stump. As I was pulling it out I discovered 3 or 4 more full shed skins. We gathered them up, found a few remaining egg shells, and packaged them all to send to school.
That's when I got
A few days later Uncle Gick came over & the FarmHands were telling him about the family of snakes when one more slithered out mid skin shed. It shot into a clump of day lilies and Bitsy decided to help it shed it's skin. As she grabbed the tail of the skin, the snake made a break out the front of the clump of greenery & what was left of it's shed.
So after our Week of the Five Snakes, when Husband called to me from the bathroom, I was sure what I was about to find.
I was wrong.
Under the soap holder in my shower, sat a walnut sized, rather terrified tree frog. How he got into the house, much less my shower, we may never know. But what I do know is when I tried to catch him with a paper towel, he jumped out from under the soap dish, landed briefly on my arm (causing another scream, jump, laugh), on to the floor & under the edge of our vanity where Husband cornered & caught him. I tossed him out the side door with a stern warning not to come back in my house no matter how posh he finds my bathroom.
Yes, I love the out of doors. I just don't want to share my living space with it.
June 7, 2011
Vacation in bullet points because I'm too tired for anything else
- drove 4 hours to Lexington to find out the hotel pool was closed & we had to entertain the FarmHands all evening in a 2 room suite. Thank the Lord for DVD players & Narnia movies.
- drove 3+ hours to Sieverville, TN to visit Knife Works with in-laws. Could have stayed another hour easily, but these folks see stuff fast.
- took FarmHands to Wonder Works in Pigeon Forge. LOVED it...all except for the glow-in-the-dark rotating entrance. Seriously messed with my head. FarmHands had a blast!
- checked into cabin & unloaded the boat load of junk it takes to shuttle this group anywhere.
- went to Dixie Stampede for dinner & show. LOVED it (especially watching the FarmHands' faces when the girl rode 2 horses at once standing up!).
- got horribly ill the last 5 minutes of the show (possible food poisoning from the night before) and spent the rest of the night wishing I could die.
- decided that when day light came, I was calling my daddy and making him come get me & take me back to Illinois (it was about 3 am at the time)
- woke up the next day & felt a tiny bit better. Decided to delay Dollywood one day & see the aquarium instead.
- drove a short distance (thank goodness) into Smokey Mt. National Park and saw the view from a lookout point then headed into Gatlinburg.
- went to see Christ of the Smokies ($5 all day parking if you're ever in the neighborhood) & found a painting I wanted for over our fireplace until I realized the price tag read $125 and not $25.
- Went to The Big Blue Aquelium (that's what HT calls it) and LOVED it (I'm really LOVING a lot of stuff today, aren't I?). My stomach wasn't so happy about all the wavy moving water, but I still really enjoyed it.
- Slept like a rock after a dose of Dramamine
- DOLLYWOOD!!!!! This was the FarmHands' first trip to an amusement park of any kind. I will leave it entirely to your imagination...but they LOVED it (see?).
- Thursday we drove 4 more hours to Cave City, KY to meet up with my parentals, Princess, Axl, and HT to do Dinosaur World (the greatest place in the entire universe) for Princess's birthday.
- Slept much less like a rock but still decently.
- Hit Mammoth Cave twice with a stop at Applebee's & Wal-Mart in between. Ate pot roast & chicken at the cabins thanks entirely to Mama & Daddy then set things on fire with my sister (in the fire ring...don't freak out).
- Drove home
Yes, I am still recovering. Yes, we had a great time. Yes, I was ready to be back in my bed.
Yesterday BabyGirl turned ten. That makes me feel old. I cannot believe I've been a mother for an entire decade. I still have no idea what I'm doing.
Husband is back to work today. The pool is up. It's hot. I can't quit sneezing. The cicadas are swarming. We're running out of Popsicles. I'm pretty sure it's summer (solstice or not).
May 28, 2011
The beginning of a long, long, long week.
Tomorrow we leave on vacation.
Yes, I know we're certifiable leaving in the middle of Memorial Day weekend, but it just happened this way. Don't judge.
This vacation has taken on a life of it's own. Back in January (maybe) Husband started talking about taking the FarmHands to Chattanooga to see the aquarium & Look Out Mountain. I was all for it. He suggested we call QM & Daddy to meet us there, stay a few nights, then go back up to their house as a stop on the way home.
Just as vacation time was being set aside & hotels were being searched for, MIL and FIL asked if we'd like to meet up with them in Gatlinburg at their time share during that week. A few weeks & a lot of morphing later & we're starting our trip off with them & finishing it off with QM & Daddy, Princess, Axl, & H.T. in Cave City, KY.
This is the part of the post where I beg for prayers. Prayers for patience, for a total lack of motion sickness, for a safe journey, for a pleasant time, for calmed tempers all around, for good weather, for precise navigation, and for fun. Things can be tense with the In-Laws (please, no snide remarks in the comments about this) but I know the kids really need this time with their grandparents. I'm praying that this week comes with a bit of healing between Husband and his father (that's been a strained relationship for years) and a lot of calmness for me. I'm also praying that HT & Bitsy love Dinosaur World as much as the older FarmHands did last time we were there. There's been some serious build-up to it.
I really am looking forward to this trip. Tomorrow night we're staying in Lexington in order to split the 8 hour drive to Gatlinburg in half...then after that it's time to Vacation like there's no tomorrow. Dixie Stampede, Dollywood, an aquarium, caves, dinosaurs, mountains and no less than 5 Google Maps printed in preparation.
In conclusion, please pray for us all...and if you get bored while I'm gone, you can check out the last time we went on a grand adventure:
Vacation: Take One
Vacation: Take Two
Vacation: Take Three
And finally: Things I learned on vacation
Hmmmm, I wonder if The Golgotha Fun Park is still for sale.
Yes, I know we're certifiable leaving in the middle of Memorial Day weekend, but it just happened this way. Don't judge.
This vacation has taken on a life of it's own. Back in January (maybe) Husband started talking about taking the FarmHands to Chattanooga to see the aquarium & Look Out Mountain. I was all for it. He suggested we call QM & Daddy to meet us there, stay a few nights, then go back up to their house as a stop on the way home.
Just as vacation time was being set aside & hotels were being searched for, MIL and FIL asked if we'd like to meet up with them in Gatlinburg at their time share during that week. A few weeks & a lot of morphing later & we're starting our trip off with them & finishing it off with QM & Daddy, Princess, Axl, & H.T. in Cave City, KY.
This is the part of the post where I beg for prayers. Prayers for patience, for a total lack of motion sickness, for a safe journey, for a pleasant time, for calmed tempers all around, for good weather, for precise navigation, and for fun. Things can be tense with the In-Laws (please, no snide remarks in the comments about this) but I know the kids really need this time with their grandparents. I'm praying that this week comes with a bit of healing between Husband and his father (that's been a strained relationship for years) and a lot of calmness for me. I'm also praying that HT & Bitsy love Dinosaur World as much as the older FarmHands did last time we were there. There's been some serious build-up to it.
I really am looking forward to this trip. Tomorrow night we're staying in Lexington in order to split the 8 hour drive to Gatlinburg in half...then after that it's time to Vacation like there's no tomorrow. Dixie Stampede, Dollywood, an aquarium, caves, dinosaurs, mountains and no less than 5 Google Maps printed in preparation.
In conclusion, please pray for us all...and if you get bored while I'm gone, you can check out the last time we went on a grand adventure:
Vacation: Take One
Vacation: Take Two
Vacation: Take Three
And finally: Things I learned on vacation
Hmmmm, I wonder if The Golgotha Fun Park is still for sale.
May 22, 2011
Now What?
It has just occurred to me that my children will not be spending 8 hours each day at school this week. In fact, they will be entirely under my supervision for the next three months. I'm not entirely sure I'm qualified for this. Maybe someone should come in and check up on us occasionally. I'm not really to be trusted.
Today, #1 Son turns 8. I'm glad. I've not been a huge fan of 7. Mostly because I can't seem to remember that number when it comes to the ages of my children. When BabyGirl was seven, I was continually telling people she was eight. I've been doing the same thing with #1 Son all year. Unfortunately I only get a brief break from seven as B.B. will be turning it in September.
#1 Son got his very own green Light Saber for his birthday today. I wish I could have frozen the look on his face for all time. He knew what was in the package before he started unwrapping it, but in his excitement, he must have momentarily forgotten. He began trembling all over and could hardly get the paper off.
My children have developed a fairly new obsession with all things Star Wars. Being a child of the 70's and 80's myself, I am a hard core fan of the original three movies. My children, being of the CGI generation, are all about the most recent three movies. In my opinion, they hardly count as true Star Wars movies. I fear Mr.Lucas may have suffered some type of brain injury as he was writing the dialogue for them.
But it still makes me happy that Bitsy named her (now deceased) kitten Princess Leia, B.B. lives to quote Yoda, and #1 Son asks me to call Uncle Bubba to check on the accuracy of their imaginary Light Saber (which they still tend to call Life Savers or occasionally Light Savers) duels.
The Force is strong with in them.
Their father on the other hand, not so much. He is continually misquoting Yoda (I'm pretty sure that's tantamount to sacrilege in some places) and just last week the following conversation actually took place in my home:
As Husband watches Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones with the FarmHands and I wash dishes....
Husband- What are those?
FarmHands- The Secret Plans.
Husband- What secret plans?
FarmHands- THE Secret Plans, Dad. (the "duh" was implied)
Husband- What are they plans for?
Me- The Death Star.
Husband- What?
Me- The. Death. Star.
Husband- What's that?
Me- What's what? They're the plans for the Death Star that R2-D2 takes from Leia to deliver to Ben in the first movie. (Do not argue with me that A New Hope is actually the fourth movie...it is now & will always be the first movie.)
Husband- No, what's the Death Star?
Me- (dropping dish sponge, removing rubber gloves, and walking into living room) You did not just ask me what the Death Star is.
Husband- Yes I did. What is it?
Oh. My. Stars.
Where have I failed this man? I thought it was bad when BabyGirl asked me who Bobba Fett was a few months back. This was so much worse.
Today, #1 Son turns 8. I'm glad. I've not been a huge fan of 7. Mostly because I can't seem to remember that number when it comes to the ages of my children. When BabyGirl was seven, I was continually telling people she was eight. I've been doing the same thing with #1 Son all year. Unfortunately I only get a brief break from seven as B.B. will be turning it in September.
#1 Son got his very own green Light Saber for his birthday today. I wish I could have frozen the look on his face for all time. He knew what was in the package before he started unwrapping it, but in his excitement, he must have momentarily forgotten. He began trembling all over and could hardly get the paper off.
My children have developed a fairly new obsession with all things Star Wars. Being a child of the 70's and 80's myself, I am a hard core fan of the original three movies. My children, being of the CGI generation, are all about the most recent three movies. In my opinion, they hardly count as true Star Wars movies. I fear Mr.Lucas may have suffered some type of brain injury as he was writing the dialogue for them.
But it still makes me happy that Bitsy named her (now deceased) kitten Princess Leia, B.B. lives to quote Yoda, and #1 Son asks me to call Uncle Bubba to check on the accuracy of their imaginary Light Saber (which they still tend to call Life Savers or occasionally Light Savers) duels.
The Force is strong with in them.
Their father on the other hand, not so much. He is continually misquoting Yoda (I'm pretty sure that's tantamount to sacrilege in some places) and just last week the following conversation actually took place in my home:
As Husband watches Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones with the FarmHands and I wash dishes....
Husband- What are those?
FarmHands- The Secret Plans.
Husband- What secret plans?
FarmHands- THE Secret Plans, Dad. (the "duh" was implied)
Husband- What are they plans for?
Me- The Death Star.
Husband- What?
Me- The. Death. Star.
Husband- What's that?
Me- What's what? They're the plans for the Death Star that R2-D2 takes from Leia to deliver to Ben in the first movie. (Do not argue with me that A New Hope is actually the fourth movie...it is now & will always be the first movie.)
Husband- No, what's the Death Star?
Me- (dropping dish sponge, removing rubber gloves, and walking into living room) You did not just ask me what the Death Star is.
Husband- Yes I did. What is it?
Oh. My. Stars.
Where have I failed this man? I thought it was bad when BabyGirl asked me who Bobba Fett was a few months back. This was so much worse.
January 19, 2011
Amazing little buggers, aren't they?
Some how my children have avoided the multiple rounds of stomach bug, strep, and flu that have ravaged their school since the beginning of the school year. I do not understand how this has been accomplished in a house hold of 6, but it has & I am not one to look a gift horse in the mouth. I am one to feed it apples and ask it if it would like to live in the kitchen.
Today that all changed. B.B. woke up winy & irritated. He only at 4 bites of breakfast, cried that he was tired, and ended up laying in the hall way when he was supposed to be brushing his teeth. A quick check showed a low grade fever and he complained of a head ache. He spent the day laying on the couch watching TV and playing Wii.
#1 Son called me from his bus driver's cell phone as they were boarding the bus to ask if I could come pick him up. He said his stomach hurt & he was sure he had a fever since B.B. had one. The bus driver told me he looked OK (not pale or flushed) and that she thought he'd be alright riding the bus home. When he got home he decided he was just hungry and not really sick.
Currently the boys are battling for the safety of the Republic on Lego Star Wars while we all wait...and wait...and wait for BabyGirl to finish her home work. I am amazed that my children have been able to unlock levels on this video game. I'm pretty sure it has happened almost entirely by accident...all 4 times. If you watch them play, they haven't the foggiest idea what they're doing but some how they accomplish things anyway. Kind of like our government.
Bitsy, on the other hand, has lost her little mind. She has decided that she is in charge of everything, including (and especially) her siblings. They don't take too well to being bossed by someone so...short. She's also attempting to starve herself. Every time someone or something gets within 5 feet of her food, it is suddenly inedible. Lilly May & Buddy Joe were under the kitchen table today while she was eating lunch. That made her steak "yucky" and she couldn't possibly eat it. 2 days ago, #1 Son breathed near her bowl & she couldn't bear to touch one more bite. I may have to build her a plastic bubble to eat in. It's got to be cheaper than buying all this food.
Today that all changed. B.B. woke up winy & irritated. He only at 4 bites of breakfast, cried that he was tired, and ended up laying in the hall way when he was supposed to be brushing his teeth. A quick check showed a low grade fever and he complained of a head ache. He spent the day laying on the couch watching TV and playing Wii.
#1 Son called me from his bus driver's cell phone as they were boarding the bus to ask if I could come pick him up. He said his stomach hurt & he was sure he had a fever since B.B. had one. The bus driver told me he looked OK (not pale or flushed) and that she thought he'd be alright riding the bus home. When he got home he decided he was just hungry and not really sick.
Currently the boys are battling for the safety of the Republic on Lego Star Wars while we all wait...and wait...and wait for BabyGirl to finish her home work. I am amazed that my children have been able to unlock levels on this video game. I'm pretty sure it has happened almost entirely by accident...all 4 times. If you watch them play, they haven't the foggiest idea what they're doing but some how they accomplish things anyway. Kind of like our government.
Bitsy, on the other hand, has lost her little mind. She has decided that she is in charge of everything, including (and especially) her siblings. They don't take too well to being bossed by someone so...short. She's also attempting to starve herself. Every time someone or something gets within 5 feet of her food, it is suddenly inedible. Lilly May & Buddy Joe were under the kitchen table today while she was eating lunch. That made her steak "yucky" and she couldn't possibly eat it. 2 days ago, #1 Son breathed near her bowl & she couldn't bear to touch one more bite. I may have to build her a plastic bubble to eat in. It's got to be cheaper than buying all this food.
January 13, 2011
An abundance of time.
Shortly before Christmas, we moved the computer into our bedroom. We are one of those quaint families with only a desk top that must stay in close proximity to our phone jacks. Since Husband naps a great deal during the day to make up for the total lack of sleep he gets at night, I have had to curb my Internet usage severely. And guess what. I'm not dead, yet.
It's amazing. You'd think I would have all this free time left since I'm not spending hours a day browsing places like www.cakewrecks.com and www.lamebook.com and www.savagechickens.com and the like. You'd think I would suddenly become an uber-productive member of society knitting hats for war widows and teaching blind orphans the states and their capitals. But instead I've been sucked into the worlds of Doctor Who, Firefly, Criminal Minds, and anything involving classic literature translated to film.
Someone help me before I turn into a couch cushion.
I am still doing Zumba at least 5 days a week. I only skip it on days when I've been very busy or spent the entire day cleaning house (that counts as cardio, doesn't it?).
It hasn't helped that we've spent most of the past few weeks snowed in in some form or another and that the FarmHands have been housebound making us all a bit testy. And I figure there's little to no point in really cleaning my house when my children are trapped inside and will just come behind me and destroy everything I've struggled to accomplish.
They went back to school today for the first time since Monday and I spent a full hour folding laundry. Just folding. Not washing or drying or ironing. After that I crashed like a 18 wheeler on black ice and spent most of the day vegging out in front of the telly (yes, I said telly. Sue me. Or sue the BBC since I've been watching it all afternoon). But I'm sure that had nothing to do with the hours spent on the couch last night when a certain small girl decided sleep was for wimps and instead we were going to, "Count all our letters."
Tomorrow is town day and I feel I must accomplish something. Even if it is a very small something....like putting away the laundry I folded today. Just kidding. I'm making the FarmHands do that.
It's amazing. You'd think I would have all this free time left since I'm not spending hours a day browsing places like www.cakewrecks.com and www.lamebook.com and www.savagechickens.com and the like. You'd think I would suddenly become an uber-productive member of society knitting hats for war widows and teaching blind orphans the states and their capitals. But instead I've been sucked into the worlds of Doctor Who, Firefly, Criminal Minds, and anything involving classic literature translated to film.
Someone help me before I turn into a couch cushion.
I am still doing Zumba at least 5 days a week. I only skip it on days when I've been very busy or spent the entire day cleaning house (that counts as cardio, doesn't it?).
It hasn't helped that we've spent most of the past few weeks snowed in in some form or another and that the FarmHands have been housebound making us all a bit testy. And I figure there's little to no point in really cleaning my house when my children are trapped inside and will just come behind me and destroy everything I've struggled to accomplish.
They went back to school today for the first time since Monday and I spent a full hour folding laundry. Just folding. Not washing or drying or ironing. After that I crashed like a 18 wheeler on black ice and spent most of the day vegging out in front of the telly (yes, I said telly. Sue me. Or sue the BBC since I've been watching it all afternoon). But I'm sure that had nothing to do with the hours spent on the couch last night when a certain small girl decided sleep was for wimps and instead we were going to, "Count all our letters."
Tomorrow is town day and I feel I must accomplish something. Even if it is a very small something....like putting away the laundry I folded today. Just kidding. I'm making the FarmHands do that.
January 1, 2011
Ringing in the New Year- FarmHands Style
Most people get dressed up, go to a party with friends, sip Champagne, and belt out Auld Lang Syne to ring in the new year. Not us. We fight over the Wii, put the kids to bed at a semi-decent hour, and veg out to Criminal Minds on the DVR. We also miss the actual change over not noticing it's 2011 until 12:25 am. Yeah, we are party animals.
Today we've spent the day playing Wii, fighting over the Wii, playing card games, fighting over card games, watching videos, and fighting over nothing. Anyone see a pattern here?
Yesterday Husband decided we should go to Wal-Mart to look for a new Wii controller (to use in my Zumba belt) and jeans for him. The trip was almost productive. In reality, he needed 3 pairs of jeans but instead we came home with one pair, a Wii controller, and Mario Kart for the kids. Oh, and did I mention the fighting all the way home?
I think the Ramones were on to something when they rocked out with I Wanna Be Sedated. I'm counting down the hours until Monday morning when I can pack 3/4 of them off to school. I know, I know, I'm a horrible mother. I should revel in the screaming, but alas, instead it just makes me want to double up my Prozac.
Actually we have had a lot of fun this week. We've laughed a lot. We've played a lot. We got to spend a lot of time with QM and Daddy and an afternoon with Uncle Gick & Unkie Di and their extended family. We visited with Uncle E and Aunt C. The kids ran around and played outside 2 days this week (60 degrees on December 31st!). I'm getting into my Zumba groove again (I LOVE this game. If you have a Wii I highly suggest it. The game will set you up on a work out calendar or you can wing it. And you can stumble about in the privacy of your own home instead of in front of 25 total strangers. So far I've worked out 20 minutes a day all but 2 days since Christmas Eve). We've watched a lot of Doctor Who. We've watched the Back to the Future movies. We've been ultra competitive playing Gamewright games (LOVE them, too).
But I am ready for Monday. I'm ready for more than 10 minutes of peace and quiet at a time. I'm ready to turn in my referee whistle. I'm ready for my house cleaning to count for something instead of being demolished immediately after I've finished.
I'm ready for 2011.
Today we've spent the day playing Wii, fighting over the Wii, playing card games, fighting over card games, watching videos, and fighting over nothing. Anyone see a pattern here?
Yesterday Husband decided we should go to Wal-Mart to look for a new Wii controller (to use in my Zumba belt) and jeans for him. The trip was almost productive. In reality, he needed 3 pairs of jeans but instead we came home with one pair, a Wii controller, and Mario Kart for the kids. Oh, and did I mention the fighting all the way home?
I think the Ramones were on to something when they rocked out with I Wanna Be Sedated. I'm counting down the hours until Monday morning when I can pack 3/4 of them off to school. I know, I know, I'm a horrible mother. I should revel in the screaming, but alas, instead it just makes me want to double up my Prozac.
Actually we have had a lot of fun this week. We've laughed a lot. We've played a lot. We got to spend a lot of time with QM and Daddy and an afternoon with Uncle Gick & Unkie Di and their extended family. We visited with Uncle E and Aunt C. The kids ran around and played outside 2 days this week (60 degrees on December 31st!). I'm getting into my Zumba groove again (I LOVE this game. If you have a Wii I highly suggest it. The game will set you up on a work out calendar or you can wing it. And you can stumble about in the privacy of your own home instead of in front of 25 total strangers. So far I've worked out 20 minutes a day all but 2 days since Christmas Eve). We've watched a lot of Doctor Who. We've watched the Back to the Future movies. We've been ultra competitive playing Gamewright games (LOVE them, too).
But I am ready for Monday. I'm ready for more than 10 minutes of peace and quiet at a time. I'm ready to turn in my referee whistle. I'm ready for my house cleaning to count for something instead of being demolished immediately after I've finished.
I'm ready for 2011.
December 19, 2010
A grown up Christmas list.
In about 45 minutes I will have been stuck on this 10 acres of land for a full week. 7 straight days. In that time I've made 2 or 3 trips to the mail box at the end of our drive, 2 trips to take out the trash, and one trip out to the sheep pen to dump table scraps. Stir Crazy would be the phrase that best suits my current frame of mind.
The FarmHands are going nearly as insane as I am. Husband decided to put all the presents under the tree today. This is the first time the FarmHands have ever seen their wrapped gifts prior to the day we celebrate Christmas. This change has caused B.B. to collapse into a bawling heap at least 3 times just this morning. He's desperate to open a gift. I really do not want to give into and therefore encourage the tantrums so I said no. I am currently public enemy #1.
Because we've been snowed and or iced in all week, Husband decided he'd do the grocery shopping Friday night after work. He's been able to make it back & forth to work with no small amount of stress. Once he's reached the high way, things have been hunky-dory...the problem is the five miles of ice between us and the highway. Since he was already out on good roads, I made him a list & sent him shopping, much to the amazement of the FarmHands. When they woke up yesterday to a pantry & fridge full of food, you'd have thought Santa himself brought it all.
While at Wal-Mart, Husband bought my Christmas present. He has a horrible time trying to keep secrets. He's already offered to tell me what it is. I declined but fear he wouldn't have been honest had I allowed him to ruin the surprise. He wrapped my gift & put it under the tree yesterday while I was baking cookies. The FarmHands are dying to know what it is, so Husband told #1 Son. #1 Son told B.B. B.B. told Bitsy. 7 seconds later, Bitsy came running out of the bedroom and yelled, "Mommy, Daddy buyed you Eclipse and...." that's when the others began screaming. "NO, Bitsy! Don't tell Mom!!" and they whisked her away to the bedroom. Husband starts laughing because he hadn't told them what he actually got for me. About a minute later Bitsy runs back out of the rooms and says, "Mommy, Daddy not get you Eclipse."
Since then they've been on a mission to wheedle the truth out of their father, who surprisingly has not cracked. This morning he told B.B. it was a banana in a box, wax fruit for the table, a board game, and other odd things.
I fear the FarmHands have run out of ways to entertain themselves. The fighting and bickering has reached epic proportions. 30 minutes ago they were in the boys room when the screaming started. I went to investigate and found Bitsy playing, "Duck, Goose, Come Chase Me!" with the boys. They're currently on their 2nd or 3rd viewing of the cartoon How the Grinch Stole Christmas for the day.
All I want for Christmas is a grown up to visit with....one that I'm not married to.
The FarmHands are going nearly as insane as I am. Husband decided to put all the presents under the tree today. This is the first time the FarmHands have ever seen their wrapped gifts prior to the day we celebrate Christmas. This change has caused B.B. to collapse into a bawling heap at least 3 times just this morning. He's desperate to open a gift. I really do not want to give into and therefore encourage the tantrums so I said no. I am currently public enemy #1.
Because we've been snowed and or iced in all week, Husband decided he'd do the grocery shopping Friday night after work. He's been able to make it back & forth to work with no small amount of stress. Once he's reached the high way, things have been hunky-dory...the problem is the five miles of ice between us and the highway. Since he was already out on good roads, I made him a list & sent him shopping, much to the amazement of the FarmHands. When they woke up yesterday to a pantry & fridge full of food, you'd have thought Santa himself brought it all.
While at Wal-Mart, Husband bought my Christmas present. He has a horrible time trying to keep secrets. He's already offered to tell me what it is. I declined but fear he wouldn't have been honest had I allowed him to ruin the surprise. He wrapped my gift & put it under the tree yesterday while I was baking cookies. The FarmHands are dying to know what it is, so Husband told #1 Son. #1 Son told B.B. B.B. told Bitsy. 7 seconds later, Bitsy came running out of the bedroom and yelled, "Mommy, Daddy buyed you Eclipse and...." that's when the others began screaming. "NO, Bitsy! Don't tell Mom!!" and they whisked her away to the bedroom. Husband starts laughing because he hadn't told them what he actually got for me. About a minute later Bitsy runs back out of the rooms and says, "Mommy, Daddy not get you Eclipse."
Since then they've been on a mission to wheedle the truth out of their father, who surprisingly has not cracked. This morning he told B.B. it was a banana in a box, wax fruit for the table, a board game, and other odd things.
I fear the FarmHands have run out of ways to entertain themselves. The fighting and bickering has reached epic proportions. 30 minutes ago they were in the boys room when the screaming started. I went to investigate and found Bitsy playing, "Duck, Goose, Come Chase Me!" with the boys. They're currently on their 2nd or 3rd viewing of the cartoon How the Grinch Stole Christmas for the day.
All I want for Christmas is a grown up to visit with....one that I'm not married to.
December 14, 2010
Wii wish you a merry Christmas.
After about 3 years of debating, Husband and I decided to get the FarmHands a Wii for Christmas (shhhh, don't tell). It will be the one & only gaming system in our house. Someday I might let them have a Kinect, but I'm pretty opposed to the traditional zone out while exercising only your thumbs gaming systems. Besides, I'm horrible at them. With the exception of Centipede (remember that one?) I never could get the hand eye coordination down....not even for Pac-Man.
The kids have been begging for a Wii ever since J got his a few years back. We didn't think they were quite coordinated for one and were not prepared to break up fights all day long. I'm still not keen on that idea, but we need something physical to keep them entertained this winter. The Wii was much cheaper than the Kinect and more age appropriate in my opinion.
But since Husband and I are completely clueless about video games, we need some help. What games would be good for our heathens? BabyGirl is 9 1/2 now, #1 Son is 7 1/2, and B.B. is 6. Bitsy's still too young to take into consideration when choosing games. I know what games I'd like. I have my heart set on a Sims game and the Wii Zumba....but will have to wait on those. First we need something to entertain the FarmHands. We have the basic Wii (no Wii fit). Any suggestions would be appreciated.
The kids have been begging for a Wii ever since J got his a few years back. We didn't think they were quite coordinated for one and were not prepared to break up fights all day long. I'm still not keen on that idea, but we need something physical to keep them entertained this winter. The Wii was much cheaper than the Kinect and more age appropriate in my opinion.
But since Husband and I are completely clueless about video games, we need some help. What games would be good for our heathens? BabyGirl is 9 1/2 now, #1 Son is 7 1/2, and B.B. is 6. Bitsy's still too young to take into consideration when choosing games. I know what games I'd like. I have my heart set on a Sims game and the Wii Zumba....but will have to wait on those. First we need something to entertain the FarmHands. We have the basic Wii (no Wii fit). Any suggestions would be appreciated.
December 13, 2010
I wanna' wash my hands, my face and hair with snow.
That's a total lie. I don't know anyone who'd really do that...but it sounds nice in the song.
We have 3-4 inches on the ground at the moment, but with drifting it's much deeper in places. My window thermometer says it's 18 degrees outside. Our first official snow day of the year was called at 7 last night. BabyGirl is still asleep and the others are lounging about in their jammies.
I'm praying for a calm day full of Christmas movies and board games. I'm bracing for a day of arguing and cabin fever. Hopefully I'll be pleasantly surprised.
Lily May & Buddy Joe have morphed into snow bunnies. Every time I turn around they're bouncing up & down to get out the door and play in their run. I don't understand this because neither dog really likes walking in the snow. They both hang back when they need to go out but shoot out the door just to stand & shiver in the snow. At least I don't have to dress them in 15 layers of protective clothing so they can spend 8 1/2 minutes outdoors.
After church yesterday, the FarmHands needed to go out to play in the snow. Bitsy lasted all of 15 minutes before she was deposited back in the mud room by her Daddy. The boys lasted about 5 minutes longer and BabyGirl came in after 25 minutes or so. It took us almost that long to get everyone dressed in the first place. And afterwards, there were snow caked coats, gloves, hats, socks, and pants to be washed. I'm not sure it's worth the trouble.
But I'm probably wrong. It wouldn't be the first time. Just ask the FarmHands.
We have 3-4 inches on the ground at the moment, but with drifting it's much deeper in places. My window thermometer says it's 18 degrees outside. Our first official snow day of the year was called at 7 last night. BabyGirl is still asleep and the others are lounging about in their jammies.
I'm praying for a calm day full of Christmas movies and board games. I'm bracing for a day of arguing and cabin fever. Hopefully I'll be pleasantly surprised.
Lily May & Buddy Joe have morphed into snow bunnies. Every time I turn around they're bouncing up & down to get out the door and play in their run. I don't understand this because neither dog really likes walking in the snow. They both hang back when they need to go out but shoot out the door just to stand & shiver in the snow. At least I don't have to dress them in 15 layers of protective clothing so they can spend 8 1/2 minutes outdoors.
After church yesterday, the FarmHands needed to go out to play in the snow. Bitsy lasted all of 15 minutes before she was deposited back in the mud room by her Daddy. The boys lasted about 5 minutes longer and BabyGirl came in after 25 minutes or so. It took us almost that long to get everyone dressed in the first place. And afterwards, there were snow caked coats, gloves, hats, socks, and pants to be washed. I'm not sure it's worth the trouble.
But I'm probably wrong. It wouldn't be the first time. Just ask the FarmHands.
December 5, 2010
And Deliver us from Christmas Vacation.....
I'm terrified. My phobia does not revolve around spiders, heights, or snakes. It's entirely hinged on the idea of my children being stuck in my house for 2 weeks at Christmas break.
You see, they've lost their ever lovin' little minds. They've spent the last few weeks trying to kill each other. Everyone hates everyone else. No one ever does anything wrong. Every bad thing is someone else's fault. The thought of having them all in the house 24 hours a day for 2 weeks is daunting.
Every morning, Bitsy and I get the kids up, get them ready, and drop them at school. Then Bitsy, Husband, and I have a fairly quite day. Husband sleeps. Bitsy watches Max & Ruby. I do my chores, surf the web, read, catch up on Criminal Minds, or nap on the couch. The only time we argue is when Husband tries to kiss me & Bitsy must intervene ("No! My Mommy! No kiss my mommy!").
When the bus pulls up at a few minutes after four, the peaces is promptly shattered. Three kids scream their way up the drive way and into the house leaving a wake of shoes, jackets, back packs, and lunch boxes behind them. They each have a shoe box and a coat hook that they always seem to forget about. The next hour is spent arguing over snacks, homework, candy, who touched whom, and anything else they can think up to fight about.
I'm wondering how much a full time Nanny would cost us over the holidays. Or some kind of seasonal boarding school for delinquents. Or even an ex-Marine drill Sergent. Yeah, I like that last idea a lot.
You see, they've lost their ever lovin' little minds. They've spent the last few weeks trying to kill each other. Everyone hates everyone else. No one ever does anything wrong. Every bad thing is someone else's fault. The thought of having them all in the house 24 hours a day for 2 weeks is daunting.
Every morning, Bitsy and I get the kids up, get them ready, and drop them at school. Then Bitsy, Husband, and I have a fairly quite day. Husband sleeps. Bitsy watches Max & Ruby. I do my chores, surf the web, read, catch up on Criminal Minds, or nap on the couch. The only time we argue is when Husband tries to kiss me & Bitsy must intervene ("No! My Mommy! No kiss my mommy!").
When the bus pulls up at a few minutes after four, the peaces is promptly shattered. Three kids scream their way up the drive way and into the house leaving a wake of shoes, jackets, back packs, and lunch boxes behind them. They each have a shoe box and a coat hook that they always seem to forget about. The next hour is spent arguing over snacks, homework, candy, who touched whom, and anything else they can think up to fight about.
I'm wondering how much a full time Nanny would cost us over the holidays. Or some kind of seasonal boarding school for delinquents. Or even an ex-Marine drill Sergent. Yeah, I like that last idea a lot.
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