March 23, 2008

I've been having a somewhat tough Easter Sunday. Everyone's cranky. Everyone's argumentative. I'm irrationally irritated. No "Easter Songs" were sung this morning at church. I heard little to none of the sermon because of the newly instigated practice of Family Sunday (no children's church one week a month) & my children's desire to do anything but sit still & listen. Things have not gone as I thought they should. And left-over pizza leaves much to be desired in the way of Easter dinner in my mind. Truth be told, I'm a bit homesick for my childhood today.

I want to wake up to pink bunny tracks leading from my bedroom door to where our Easter baskets are waiting. I want to sit & fidget while QM takes my hair out of the sponge rollers I slept in last night. I want to wear my new dress, white patent leather Mary Janes, white kid gloves, and my new straw hat to church. I want to set with my entire family & sing "Were You There." I want to smile to myself as QM tried not to cringe when we sing "Up From the Grave He Arose." I want to listen to Daddy sing Watch the Lamb while G'ma M&M tries not to cry too much.

Then I want to have a big family dinner at G'Ma M&M's after church. I want to try to peek out the lace curtains in G'ma's living room while Daddy, Uncle M, and Uncle Greenteeth hide eggs out in the yard. I want to tear out into the yard with Inkling and her Younger Brother 1977 to look for the "hard to find eggs" while Mama & Aunt Silverbelle & Aunt D help the little kids find the ones hidden in plain sight.

I want to remember why we're celebrating today. I want to rest assured in my salvation. I want to feel wrapped in the arms of my Lord. I want to know that my Redeemer Lives. I want my children to know for a fact that this day has little to do with plastic eggs & chocolate bunnies & everything to do with the Lamb of God.

I had to choose to celebrate Christmas last year. Easter may take the same amount of work this year. I wish that wasn't the case, but fact of the matter is, this is my truth today. I'd love to get to a place where these things are not struggles for me.

Until then, I will leave you with a bit of my memory & pray that you would be blessed by it & by the God of Peace.

They led us to Golgotha,
They drove nails
deep in His feet and hands,
Yet upon the cross I heard Him pray
Father, forgive them.
Oh, never have I seen such love
in any other eyes,
Into thy hands I commit my spirit
He prayed and the He died,
I stood for what seemed like years,
I'd lost all sense of time
until I felt to tiny hands
holding tight to mine,
The children stood there weeping,
I heard the oldest say,
Father please forgive us,
the lamb ran away.
Daddy, daddy,
What have we seen here,
There's so much
that we don't understand,
So I took them in my arms,
And we turned and faced the cross,
Then I said dear children
watch the lamb.


Grace said...

I can hear and see your're daddy singing "Watch the Lamb" on the stage. Wow...memories!

Kork said...

one of my favorite songs Farmie, and knowing Daddy sang it, makes it even more special!

I hope yesterday and today were better!

Ht's Princess said...

ya know I can't even read the lyrics of that song with out tearing up! I miss those days!

Mrs. Darling said...

I know Im late on this but this was just a beautiful post. I am fortunate in that my Easter was very traditional filled with the old gospel hymns and family and easter ham.

Its nice to meet others who love those old hymns. The new modern music cant compare!