First of all, I have a parenting tip. If your infant is fussy only because she's bored, try picking her up by the ankles. Just make sure your husband isn't watching. Really, it doesn't hurt her as long as you don't let her dangle more than a few seconds, but occasionally, Daddies get freaked out by this.
Secondly, is it too much to ask that my children actually wear clothes while decorating the Christmas tree? And by clothes I mean at least decent pajamas. And speaking of pajamas, why is it that my 6 year old daughter, who owns a drawer full of the most adorable night gowns & PJ sets, insists on wearing a bleach spattered, torn, adult Large sized GRITS (Girls Raised In The South) T-shirt constantly? Why can't she put on one of the cute night gowns so I can take adorable pictures of her and her pajama clad brothers decorating the tree in the hopes I can capture a moment for our Christmas cards? No, instead it will be #1 Son in pajama bottoms, B.B. in orange underpants with glow-in-the-dark skulls, and BabyGirl in the a fore mentioned shirt...that I would like to burn. Hey, I have a fire place...I have matches...OK, stop now. This is a slippery slope. If I start burning t-shirts what's next? That annoying toy who's batteries will never die? The video they insist on watching 15 times a day? The stuffed dog who's ownership is hotly debated? The Barbie that's missing a leg & has hair that's beginning to dread-loc?
We were going to decorate the tree last night, but silly me, I insisted on the toys being picked up before I drug out the huge boxes of highly sentimental ornaments. By the time that fight was over I could have pushed the Grinch's sled off the side of Mt.Crumpet & laughed maniacally as the packages, boxes & bags plunged to their demise. Forget all the Whos down in Whoville beneath who were busy now hanging their mistletoe wreaths.
Maybe, possibly, there is a slight chance that we'll get the ornaments out tonight & get 3 or 4 hung before total melt down occurs. Someone, please, shoot me with some Christmas Cheer...or some heavily spiked egg nog.