December 16, 2011

The real question is, "Do they care it's Christmas time?"

As promised in my post below, I'm now going to tell you my most despised Christmas song.

Do They Know It's Christmas Time? by Band Aid. And yes, I have a few reasons to share with you. (You didn't really think you'd get off with just a pat answer, did you?)

First of all, let's take a look at the lyrics:

Paul Young
It's Christmas time, there's no need to be afraid
At Christmas time, we let in light and we banish shade.

Boy George
And in our world of plenty, we can spread a smile of joy!
Throw your arms around the world at Christmas time.

(Phil Collins on the drums)

George Micheal
But say a prayer -
pray for the other ones
At Christmas time.

Simon Le Bon
It's hard, but when you're having fun,
There's a world outside your window,

Sting and Simon Le Bon
And it's a world of dread and fear,
Where the only water flowing is a bitter sting of tears
And the Christmas bells that ring there are the clanging chimes of doom.

Well, tonight thank God it's them instead of you

And there won't be snow in Africa this Christmas time.
The greatest gift they'll get this year is life.
Where nothing ever grows,
No rain or rivers flow,
Do they know it's Christmas time at all?

Here's to you,
Raise your glass for everyone.
Here's to them underneath that burning sun.

Do they know it's Christmas time at all?
Feed the world
Feed the world
Feed the world
Let them know it's Christmas time and
Feed the world
Let them know it's Christmas time and
Feed the world
Let them know it's Christmas time and
Feed the world
Let them know it's Christmas time and
Feed the world
Let them know it's Christmas time and
Feed the world
Let them know it's Christmas time...

First of all, these are quite possibly the worst lyrics I've ever heard. With the exception of the "Feed the World, Let them know it's Christmas time," hook, this song is drivel. And the hook isn't really that amazing in it's self.

I realize that at the time the song was written there was a massive drought & famine taking place in large parts of Africa, but I'm pretty sure there were still rivers flowing & rain falling in places. I'm also sure that something grew there. It wasn't a post-apocalyptic wasteland. I also know that many, many people died during that famine but the line "The greatest gift they'll get this year is life," is horrible. I know this wasn't the intent, but to me it sounds like Band Aid is granting this gift of life themselves.

Bono's line makes me want to punch him in the face. "Well, thank God it's them instead of you." WHAT?? Thank God my neighbors are starving but my family is fine. Yeah, that's a great attitude to have. The sentiments may have been pure, but the execution leaves much to be desired.

And we're going to offer up a toast to starving children in Africa? Really? Yeah, I'm sure tossing back a Bacardi & Coke is going to help fight world hunger.

My real issue is that for some reason it's unacceptable for starving people in a drought ravaged country to not know it's Christmas. I'm pretty sure they were more concerned about feeding their families one meal a day than about celebrating anything.

But the real icing on the cake is the short voice over by Bob Geldof at the end of the song. "This record was recorded on the 25th of November 1984. It's now 8am on the 26th. We've been here 24 hours and I think it's time we went home."

I'm so very sorry you had to spend 24 hours in a recording studio. It must've been so difficult. How ever did you manage? It was nearly too much for Western society to ask of it's elite musicians. Why didn't you mention Status Quo's contribution? I'm sure it really eased the burden you were all under.

"Once Status Quo produced their bag of cocaine and the booze started to flow – I brought six bottles of wine from my flat, which disappeared in a minute – it became a party." -Robin Eggar

Yup, nothing says Feed the Hungry in Honor of the Birth of Our Savior like a booze & drug fueled marathon recording session.

Oh, and if you're looking for the perfect Christmas break-up song to replace the Wham! classic (I think Handel may be rolling over in his grave over that one), you might want to try Fall Out Boy's Yule Shoot Your Eye Out.


Layla said...

This. Pure awesome.

Aimee said...

I agree!