October 5, 2007

How to make Banana Bread with the help of two preschool boys

First of all, make sure you have all your ingredients and necessary equipment ready before you ever mention to them that you're planning on making something. They simply do not have the time to wait for you to assemble such things. These are trivial matters and they would much rather be creating new civilizations with blocks, plastic animals, and match box cars than standing around for 2 minutes while you gather flour, sugar, and baking soda from the pantry.

Secondly, do not expect them to wash their hands willingly. I mean, really, they were just washed 3 hours ago. Why do it again today? And a dress code is rather ridiculous as well. Why can't a boy make banana bread in the nude? Underpants are seriously overrated when the time comes to smash bananas with a fork. Besides, there's that naked guy cooking on TV all the time...what? He's not really cooking naked? What a rip off. Maybe you can meet in the middle...underpants and big sister's aprons. It keeps all the important things covered.

Thirdly, you may want to rethink the recipe. Or better yet, throw the recipe on the floor every chance you get. It's so much more fun to cook if the instructions are at least 4 feet away and there's a half naked boy attempting to keep them out of your reach.

Now, on to the fun stuff.
Fun thing #1: Step stools. Oh yeah, step stools are the bomb! Especially when there's one for each of you to stand on (Thank you Grandpa and Grandma M&M for making us another step stool...you saved my sanity today).
Fun Thing #2: Sifting. This is a surprisingly exciting thing to do. Shake that strainer. Watch the flour fly. Yahoo!
Fun thing #3: Dumping anything in a bowl. Seriously cool stuff, this dumping business. It's even worth giving your brother a black eye if he attempts to take your turn at dumping.
Fun thing #4: Screaming all the ingredients' names as they're put into the bowl. SOUR CREAM!! BANANAS!! BAKING POWDER!! BUTTER!! One more time, with feeling! Oh, and here is where I should mention that smelling real vanilla extract (especially if it came from Mexico in a big brown bottle) is not a fun thing to do. It stinks. All though this may be a good time to introduce the Alcohol is not good for you topic.
Fun thing #5: Asking repeatedly, and often, to lick anything on the counter. Spatula? Mixer beaters? Bowls? Butter wrapper? Who cares if Mom's still stirring with the wooden spoon, I WANT TO LICK IT NOW!! Batter still in the bowl? That's OK, we can lick around it. Flour left on the strainer/sifter...sure, why not?
Fun thing #6: Adding words to your vocabulary. OK, now before you think I was cussing up a storm in front of my children, I should clarify that our new word is "gradually." As in, "No, we can't dump all the dry ingredients in the bowl at one time. We have to mix it in gradually." Huh? "A little bit at a time." Just don't expect the new word to stick after the excitement of cooking is over.
Fun thing #7: Setting in front of the oven watching through the door for the entire hour and 20 minutes it takes the bread to bake. Well, it's fun for the first 6 seconds anyway. Then can we please see if SpongeBob is on, Mom?

I'll try to post the recipe on wha'cha got cookin'? later tonight.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...
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Anonymous said...

Just don't throw in extra ingredients that was uncalled for..like WORMS!! or DIRT!!

Kork said...

This makes me wish Captain Chaos was big enough to help rather than simply open all the unlocked doors and drawers in my kitchen and empty them onto the floor! Thank goodness for towels and Tupperware!