January 20, 2010

From the potty mouths of babes.

Well, one babe in particular. And he really doesn't do it on purpose. It's great what being 5, having a bit of a speech impediment, and being easily confused can do to one's vocabulary.

For example (and all of these have come straight from B.B. in the past week):

B.B.- (playing with an action figure who's life was in dire peril)OH-shit!
Me- WHAT?!
B.B.- OH-shit.
Me- Did you just say, "Oh shit?!"
B.B.- No, Mom. OH-shit, like where all the water is! He's falling in it.
Me- Ocean?
B.B.- That's what I said.
Me- Whew.

While watching Burn-E (the short on the Wall-E DVD):
"Oh, I love this show. This guy really craps me up. He's so funny, Mom. Burn-e really craps me up! He just craps me up all the time!" He must have said it 8 times in 5 minutes.

And Sunday night. B.B. & I were sitting in the arm chair watching TV. I dropped the remote & asked #1 Son to get it for me. B.B. quickly leaned over the arm of our chair & snatched up the remote nearly tipping the entire chair over with both of us in it.
Me- Whooo, man, be careful.
B.B.- It's OK, Mom. I'm a ho.
Me- Excuse me?
B.B.- I'm a ho.
Me- Really. Who told you that?
B.B.- I just knowed it. 'Scept my scoop thing is in the front, not in the back. You know, the scoop thing that picks stuff up.
Me- OH! You mean a back hoe.
B.B.- That's what I said!

So maybe the problem is really me & not B.B.


Anita said...

Too cute. Made me think of the time when Jake was playing with his G.I. Joes. All of I sudden I heard him say hell or damn. I said, "Jacob, we don't say that". Suddenly, he said, "But mom, HE says it."

Staci said...

I love it!

My now 5-yr-old could not say "tr" at the beginning of a word when he was learning to talk. For some reason he replaced it with "f".

So - It's Christmas, and we're at our church party. Santa was there, and Griff climbed up on his lap. When asked what he wanted for Christmas, Griff loudly proclaimed, "I want a __uck!" which was followed by that unbelievable cricket-chirping silence where no one quite knows how to respond. Being a well-seasoned, grandfatherly type, Santa finally said, "Don't we all?"