I woke up at 6:30 & got dressed before the FarmHands woke up. Fed everyone breakfast & started getting ready to take the older kids to school & head for my yearly check-up with my OB-GYN when Husband decided he wanted to go too. I spent 3 minutes chewing him out & explaining that he is more than welcome to come along, but I really need more than 15 minutes notice when I have to get 4 kids ready to go instead of 2.
We headed out & dropped the big kids off for their last day of school. I read most of the 45 minute trip to town...that part was good. Then it was time for fun...loads & loads of fun....the kind of fun that involves a paper gown & a speculum....yeah for me. I told Doc about my PMS issues & we discussed options. In the end he wrote me a script for a low dose of Prozac. I was surprised when he suggested it. He said it has worked for many women (and quite a few of his patients) and he thinks it's a good place to start. He said it should even help with the cramps I've had so much trouble with. If I don't see a change in the next few months, he wants to discuss Endometrial Ablation.
I left thinking I had a jumping off place & was optimistic when Husband drove up in the van (he had run to Rural King while I was in my appointment). When I told him what Doc said, he did not handle it well. I know he doesn't understand what I've been dealing with. He knows about the cramps & headaches, but he really has only a shadow of an idea of what I've been dealing with emotionally.
He's not a big one for talking about feelings & emotions so I don't really share much with him. He's of the bottle it up & deal with it school (it has a lot to do with his upbringing). That doesn't really work when it comes to issues like this. He also doesn't understand chemical imbalances & hormonal issues...he knows little about them & has no point of reference. Because depression runs in my family, I fully grasp that depression can be much more than the blues. Medication of most any kind worries him. The side effects listed on any form are enough to make him avoid it. He's an antibiotic & pain killer kind of guy. Other than that he sees no need for medication.
An argument ensued. My day went down hill fast. I tried to read on the way home, but was too frustrated & couldn't concentrate. By the time we got home I was exhausted. I wanted to curl up & sleep the day away. Nothing had been dealt with (try as I might) & I'd had it.
After picking the FarmHands up from school, I stopped by the pharmacy to find out how our insurance was going to work with the script (most of the time we pay very little if not nothing at all). In the end, it was free to us, so I came home with a small green bottle. I emailed Husband & told him about it & he responded with a simple, "OK."
I took my first dose this morning & thus far have had no ill side effects. I know it can take up to four weeks for the full effect to kick in & I'm hoping & praying for the best. I'm also hoping Husband will understand why I have to at least try this route. Something has to change.
6 comments:
It's hard to deal with prejudices about medical care - reasonable or unreasonable. I don't think men will ever really understand the whole concept of the effects of hormones on a woman. They might joke or complain about PMS, but it can't really be internalized. I don't pretend to understand how testosterone works, but I can certainly tell when there's too much of it around.
I hope the prozac will help. When you expect to be miserable on a monthly basis, it colors your whole life. Good luck.
farm wife....I take prozac for the same issues and it has been a life saver!! my husband is fully behind me because he was able to see the results. i hope your hubby can learn to understand and support you. it is very hard to deal with issues when you have all these feelings inside that wont go away. I thank God for the knowledge that he has given to us to make medicine that is helpful. I hope you do as well with it as I do!
Take it if it works. My husband is much like yours as so many men are. They function from a "let me do it myself" way of thinking.....which is nice most of the time. :-)
The bottom line: If Momma ain't happy, nobody is happy. True? :-)
Lots of prayers dearie...that this will be the answer you need, and that your FarmBoy will get it through his head after the next go 'round being worlds better...
Hugs, and remember...now you have 2 older kids who can help out around the house during summer vacation. Seriously...I'm so not joking on this one...they're more than old enough to help out with things. That will help immensely to!
Lots of people don't understand. If you know anyone that has ever had severe allergies, they can get it. Your skin doesn't fit so everything is irritating.
I had an endometrial ablation about four years ago. BEST. THING. EVER. I'm surprised about the prozac but not really, it's all interconnected eh? My reason for having the ablation was multiple and excessive activity during the month (trying to tread lightly in case I might offend anyone :o) and lots of pain/cramping from my endometriosis. This was my last step before the big "H". I'm soooooo glad I had it done. Pain is nearly non-existant, as well as the other issue not being nearly non-existant. Again, best thing I ever had done. Good luck with the issues and hope you get the support you need from the farmies.
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