September 10, 2008

FarmWife Asks

I have this dear red headed Canadian cousin who is expecting her first child early next year. The darling Grasshopper (as his parents are calling him) is, in fact, a boy. This was recently discovered via ultrasound. Grasshopper's mom is having some anger issues. She & I discussed this fact on the phone earlier this week. She admitted to being easily irritated, easily angered, and (occasionally) pointlessly furious. I told her it's just a part of carrying a baby boy. That is my theory.

Here's the basis for my theory...or at least part of it.

When I was expecting B.B. #1 Son was little (he was 15 months old when his brother was born). One Friday I went to town, did my shopping, came home, & unloaded groceries. I had purchased a new bath brush. It was a nice one with soft bristles & a long wooden handle. I decided to scrub my bathroom before using my lovely new bath brush.

I'm not sure how it all played out, but I believe I planted #1 Son in the living room with his dad & his sister so I could clean the bathroom. I do know he made more than one trip into the bathroom (with help since he couldn't open the door on his own) & I re-planted him in the living room getting more & more frustrated each time.

Finally, I emptied my shower & began scrubbing it. I stepped out to rinse the door only to find #1 Son standing in my bathroom chewing on my razor with my new bath brush gripped in his other fist. The razor's plastic safety cover was in place. He was not injured in the slightest. (Please, no negative comments about my Husband being irresponsible. I do not remember what else was going on that day & I know he'd have NEVER let #1 Son in the room if he'd have known my razor was reachable.)

I went completely ape s**t. There's really no other phrase for it.

I snatched him up, removed the razor from his pudgy grip, and took him back in the living room, put him on the floor, took my bath brush away from him...and things got nasty. I started screaming at Husband, and I mean SCREAMING at him. I do not remember what I said, but bodily harm was probably threatened if the baby was allowed back in the room & I'm pretty sure I called my Husband a few names I wouldn't normally. Then I threw my new bath brush on the ground with all my might, breaking it into 3 or 4 pieces, & stormed back into the bath room.

I am normally not that volatile. I do have a temper. I do yell & scream at times. I do not normally flip out like that. It was nasty. It was scary. It was too thinly veiled when I was carrying my boys. The anger seemed to simmer just under the surface for at least the last 6 months of each of those pregnancies. It was hard. That was a particularly horrid incident. I don't remember any more quite that bad, but I do remember wanting to unleash like that many times during my boy pregnancies. I remember planning my escape & trying to figure out just how I could leave my home & family without damaging my children in the process. It was not pretty.

My theory is that the overload of testosterone in a woman's body while carrying a boy can make her exceptionally prone to anger issues. If too much testosterone can make a man prone to violence, what will it do to a woman?

My question is, do any of you boy mama's out there know where I'm coming from? My sister agrees with me. I think Art does as well (but then she punched her husband in the face when she was carrying their daughter...but then if you've ever met her ex...OK, I'll stop). I know some of you only have boys so you have nothing to compare, but I don't remember the anger when I was preggers with my girls.

What do you think?


Grace said...

Sorry, I certainly cannot relate with that theory! I think alot of it is just pregnancy period, not necessarily what we're carrying!!

Mrs Pop said...

I don't know if it was the fact I was carrying a boy or not, but I was a walking super bitch for at least 7 out of the 9 months I was pregnant.

I like that theory, though...

Kork said...

OMG! I was horrible with Captain Chaos...even though there was nothing out of the ordinary with the pregnancy (no sickness, no bloating, no swelling etc) I could not keep a lid on my temper...

Of course, I think I was so tired carrying Tiny Princess, that Capt Chaos got the short end of the stick...but I hear ya...and think you're on to something! Some women are just more sensitive to the testosterone than others...