January 14, 2008

Of course I have a secret identity. Can you see me in this... at the supermarket?

B.B. is watching The Incredibles this morning. It's easier to appreciate movies when you haven't had to watch it three times a day for the past week.

Husband paused as he was walking through the living room and watched for a minute. Then he looked at me and said, "They sound like us." He's right.

Helen: Dash got sent to the office again.
Bob: What? What for?
Dash: Nothing!
Helen: He put a tack on the teacher's chair. *During* class.
Dash: Nobody saw me. You could barely see it on the tape.
Bob: They caught you on tape and you still got away with it? Whoa! You must have been booking! How fast do you think you were going?
Helen: Bob, we are not encouraging this!
*****
Helen: Bob! It's time to engage!
Bob: What?
Helen: Oh, don't just stand there, Bob, I need you to... intervene!
Bob: You want me to intervene? [picks up table]
Bob: There, I'm intervening! I'm intervening!
*****
Bob: I should have told you I was fired, I admit it. But I didn't want you to worry.
Helen: You didn't want me to *worry*? And now we're running for our lives through some godforsaken jungle?
Bob: [grinning happily] You keep trying to pick a fight, but I'm still just happy you're alive.
*****
Bob: It's okay, kids. We were just having a discussion.
Violet: Pretty loud discussion.
Bob: But that's okay, because the important thing is that your mother and I are a team, united against the forces of...
Helen: Pigheadedness?
Bob: I was gonna say evil

When did Pixar begin taping our lives to use in their movies...and why aren't we getting a cut? We should go on strike with the writers union. And where the heck are my superpowers? Seriously, Ya'll. I could use arms that stretch clean across the house.

2 comments:

Kork said...

Dude! I'd totally be suing for likeness rights...I mean, c'mon!!!! How can they get secret cameras in there and think they were going to get away with it?!?!?!?

If you two are the Bob and Helen, who does that make me and BB??

Samantha said...

Hi, I'm a new unveiled lurker. I found you from A wandering Heart's blog. My education and career has been in child development, so your post for a prayer request regarding your daughter getting dressed caught my attention. The issues you are having with your daughter sound like a sensory integration disorder. If you would like more information or have any questions, please feel free to email me at samanthadavis92@yahoo.com. I would be glad to help you in anyway that I can. I'll be praying too.