My Friends

Once upon a time I moved to Tennessee. I had lived in Illinois my entire life. In one house for 11 years, and after we moved I lived with in a few blocks of the house I'd lived in since I was 6 months old. Moving was not my idea of a good time. I was miserable. I wanted to go home. I had no friends. I was 12. It was March; School was almost over.

My first day of school in Tennessee I was accosted in homeroom by a very vibrant girl. "Hi! I'm Did! What's your name? Are you from Michigan?" I must say I was taken back a bit. Up till then, no one had paid much attention to me except to ask if the cute new guy who started school that day too was my brother. I introduced myself, but wasn't sure how to proceed.

I am utterly grateful that she was not put off. She spoke to me on a regular basis and was very kind. I was unsure of myself and my new surroundings, so I didn't pursue friendships at all. The next August she called me just before school started to ask about my class schedule. We had the same homeroom and a few classes so that meant re-acquainting in 8th grade.

I think what cinched our relationship was the talent show that year. Did, another friend of her's (P.K. 'cause she was one...Preacher's Kid, that is), and I were going to lip-synch Rockin' Robin and P.K. had worked out choreography. For some reason (I don't remember why) P.K. had to drop out before we made it to auditions. A last minute change had Did and me scrambling to arrange an act around Secret Agent Man as covered by Bruce Willis...yup, Bruno had an album. It consisted of Did doing the "singing" and me running around behind her hamming it up a la Get Smart. I'd love to see it now, but I'm not sure it was video taped. We won the talent contest and $50. We had to perform our act at a school assembly. It was a riot.

After that we practically lived in each other's homes. Hardly a weekend went by when one of us was not camped out on the other's floor. We watched Dirty Dancing and The North and The South obsessively. Anne of Green Gables was also a favorite. And then she discovered Young Riders...it was a show based on the Pony Express...and cast with young, good looking men. We were mall rats. We joined the 8th grade choir together. We dug pocket change out of my couch cushions so we could go to the movies.

Freshman year in Highschool Did was in the flag corps in the marching band. I thought she was nuts. She had to practice 2-3 times a week, lost all Friday nights, and most Saturdays. I was lonely. Her circle of friends expanded. Mind did through her. That spring she convinced me to try out for flag...I did and the next year I was there with her every game, practice, and contest. Joined at the hip would be appropriate.

All this time Did had a very shy friend named Art. She was a little backwards and even more unsure of herself than I. Did always wanted me to befriend Art, but I was never sure. She wouldn't talk and seemed terrified of everyone. Junior year in High school Art and I were in the same Latin class. She and Did had been biology partners and Did kept saying, "You really need to talk to her. You'd really like her." Finally I started saying Hi to her as she left Latin. She'd kind of duck, nod, and mumble back at me. I thought, 'This is useless. She doesn't want to talk to me.' I gave up.

Early our Senior year we had 2 friends, they were cousins, who ran away from home. L*O*N*G Painful story short, the incident brought me and Art together. We began chatting. We began laughing. We became friends. She was hysterical. She was so smart. She was so creative. It seemed we became friends just in time for me to go back to Illinois for college. Art wrote me occasionally. We talked on the phone occasionally. When I was home on break, she and Did would take me out to play.

Just before the end of the school year, I made the decision to not return the next year. I didn't know what I wanted to do, but I knew I didn't want to be 8 hours away from home anymore. Art had just moved into the apartment behind her parents house. I'm not sure, but I think it was Did's idea that I move in with her. I came home from school on my 19th birthday, and moved into a closet of a room in a closet of an apartment. We had the best time. Did was our semi-permanent house guest. I had no license and no car, so Art packed me around everywhere.

Living in "the Love Shack" together took Art and I from buddies to best friends...although we'd never call it that. We only referred to each other as 'my room mate'...and still do on occasion. Did, Art and I have seen each other through break ups, drop outs, moves, loss, pregnancy, child birth, separations, celebrations, good times, and horribly traumatic times. I wasn't in touch with Did as much as I was with Art, but that is beginning to remedy. I've gone months without speaking to either. Now it's rare if a week goes by when Art and I don't talk.

They've been my friends for 17 & 13 years. I can't imagine my life without them. I can't imagine who I'd be without them. Art is one of the strongest people I know. She's the support of her entire family. She's raising 3 kids on her own. She works full time, and is back in school. She's lost her husband and her father in the past two years, but I've never seen her loose her faith. She still dances and sings (think StarSearch) and lives. I know I would crumble under the pressure she'd held up against. She's thrived when I would have died.

Did is a vivacious and creative person. She's the reason I survived High school and wasn't a friendless slob. She's creative, and loving, and funny. She moved to Alaska, she went to Europe, and I've lived vicariously through her. I won't see or talk to her for months and then when I do see her, she brings me a dog food bag full of clothes, elephants, and a tea towel from London. She's a kindred spirit.

So ladies, when the kids are older, or we can get my folks to baby sit, we'll dance the circle, eat scattered, smothered, covered, and diced, take pictures in the middle of the Nashville Hwy at 3 am, and sing Tom Petty out the car windows at the top of our lungs...unless of course we're too old for that. In that case, we'll go to Ruby Tuesdays and tell them it's my birthday! I love you.